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42 lines
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<!doctype html><html lang=en dir=auto><head><meta charset=utf-8><meta http-equiv=X-UA-Compatible content="IE=edge"><meta name=viewport content="width=device-width,initial-scale=1,shrink-to-fit=no"><meta name=robots content="noindex, nofollow"><title>Cupid is so dumb | AlipourIm journeys</title>
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<meta name=keywords content><meta name=description content="The lyrics are being played in my brain day and night.
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“A hopeless romantic all my life”
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“Surrounded by couples all the time”
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“I guess I should take it as a sign”
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But… “I gave a second chance to Cupid”
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“But now I’m left here feelin’ stupid”
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I might’ve given more than two chances to cupid.
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But I’m still left here felling’ stupid.
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“I look for his arrows every day”"><meta name=author content="Iman Alipour"><link rel=canonical href=https://blog.alipour.eu/posts/cupid/><link crossorigin=anonymous href=/assets/css/stylesheet.31b150d909186c48d6dbbf653acc2489945fa9ac2c8f8cd3fe8448e89e40fccf.css integrity="sha256-MbFQ2QkYbEjW279lOswkiZRfqawsj4zT/oRI6J5A/M8=" rel="preload stylesheet" as=style><link rel=icon href=https://blog.alipour.eu/favicon.ico><link rel=icon type=image/png sizes=16x16 href=https://blog.alipour.eu/favicon-16x16.png><link rel=icon type=image/png sizes=32x32 href=https://blog.alipour.eu/favicon-32x32.png><link rel=apple-touch-icon href=https://blog.alipour.eu/apple-touch-icon.png><link rel=mask-icon href=https://blog.alipour.eu/safari-pinned-tab.svg><meta name=theme-color content="#2e2e33"><meta name=msapplication-TileColor content="#2e2e33"><link rel=alternate hreflang=en 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<span class=post-meta-item><a href=https://blog.alipour.eu/posts/cupid/#isso-thread class=isso-comments-link>Comments</a></span></div></header><div class=post-content><p>The lyrics are being played in my brain day and night.</p><p>“A hopeless romantic all my life”</p><p>“Surrounded by couples all the time”</p><p>“I guess I should take it as a sign”</p><p>But… “I gave a second chance to Cupid”</p><p>“But now I’m left here feelin’ stupid”</p><p>I might’ve given more than two chances to cupid.</p><p>But I’m still left here felling’ stupid.</p><p>“I look for his arrows every day”</p><p>“I guess he got lost or flew away”</p><p>But does it matter anymore?
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It shouldn’t. It really shouldn’t.</p><p>Now all these jokes aside, today I went to Mensa with my group. When eating, I saw a group of people who I’ve been trying to hang out with, and every time they tell me they let me know to join them, but today I saw them, they hadn’t told me.</p><p>Funny how my mind jumps to conclusions quickly. Funny how I feel left alone so quickly. Or maybe it isn’t funny, idk. What I do know however is that I’m hurt. There is a bit more to the story than that, but I don’t want to open it up. It’s way too personal to be opened.</p><p>The thing is, all of this is just badly affecting me. I cannot really focus on my work, and studies. Maybe I should consider doing more home office? Idk. It could be good though.</p><p>I’ve been trying to jump from one addiction to another, just to calm my senses, just to forget, just to move on.</p><p>I started with ordering unhealthy food from Uber, eating Tuna and Rice, skipping breakfast, watching crap on Youtube, but none of it help. I then went to thm, that has been helping a bit, but not enough.</p><p>I need to be productive at work, I need to take care of my health, I know if I do these, I will feel better about myself and this MDD will go away. Or at least I hope.</p><p>For now all I know is that I’m stuck in MDD, and I cannot get out of it. I’m glad suicidal thoughs are off the table. I’m just glad. They only thing I see is darkness, but I know it will change. The sun will rise. That reminds me, is the wind rising? No? Yes? If so, we need to live.</p><p>I think this is just so painful to me in the sense that I don’t really have many friends that I consider as friends, and I’m being left alone from some groups that I don’t necesserially wanna be a part of. But oh well, I should not care.</p><p>Credit: Cupid by FIFTY FIFTY</p><hr><div class=signature-block style=margin-top:1rem><p><strong>Downloads:</strong>
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<a href=/sources/posts/cupid.md>Markdown</a> ·
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<a href=/sources/posts/cupid.md.asc>Signature (.asc)</a></p><details class=signature><summary>View OpenPGP signature</summary><pre style=font-size:.85em;overflow-x:auto;padding:.75rem>-----BEGIN PGP SIGNATURE-----
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-----END PGP SIGNATURE-----
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</pre></details><p><em>Verify locally:</em></p><pre style=font-size:.85em;overflow-x:auto;padding:.75rem>curl -fSLO https://blog.alipour.eu/sources/posts/cupid.md
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curl -fSLO https://blog.alipour.eu/sources/posts/cupid.md.asc
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gpg --verify cupid.md.asc cupid.md
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</pre></div></div><footer class=post-footer><ul class=post-tags></ul><nav class=paginav><a class=prev href=https://blog.alipour.eu/posts/loop_of_doom/><span class=title>« Prev</span><br><span>The Loop of Doom</span>
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